Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Patty Gibson: 1947-1965

Patty Gibson

This is not meant to be a downer but a tribute to the memory of Patty Gibson, my friend, who was a kind hearted soul and never had a mean thing to say about anyone. For some reason I have been thinking of Patty for the past month, then when I saw her pictured in Mr. Dietzer’s class, I wanted to write a tribute to her.

Patty and I became friends in high school. I’m not exactly sure what brought about our first meeting and friendship, although I think our love of horses had something to do with it. I don’t recall us ever having any classes together. She was in band, I was not. I believe she was taking college prep classes and I did not, so if not for horses we may have never become friends and that would have been my loss.

I was friends with Patty’s neighbor Mike S. who also had a horse. Mike and I rode together a lot and since he lived close to Patty, it was only a matter of time before Patty and I became fast friends.

Patty was an only child and her parents, although nice enough, were very strict. Patty was allowed to have small parties (girls only) and sleepovers, but I don’t recall her ever spending the night at my house. She may have spent the night, I just don’t remember. Her mother let her have Halloween parties, girls only of course. We had fun and her mother did the party up right, making it real spooky in the basement and we all pretended to be scared and screamed and laughed at each other.

Before our Junior Prom we had a small shop set up in Patty’s basement, where a lot of us would stop by to work on the decorations for the prom. I remember making a LOT of paper machete star fish!

One incident I’ll never forget: when we were in 10th or 11th grade Patty’s cat had kittens and Patty was told by her father to get rid of them. Her father gave her some ether and told her she would have to euthanize the kittens. Her parents wouldn’t do it, they made Patty do it. I remember she cried and cried for several days. As you can imagine, it was a very traumatic experience for a young girl, or anyone for that matter, to have to put down their own pets. She buried the kittens in the field behind her house. I felt sorry for her and thought her parents were mean.

After Patty got her driver’s license, she was over at my house a lot, mostly visiting with my mom! My whole family loved Patty and the feeling was mutual. I think Patty craved the whole family atmosphere. There were 5 kids in my family and sometimes our cousins would be there, too, and we lived on a farm with lots of animals. Patty enjoyed herself at my house.
Patty was born with a hole in her heart. Her parents were told that Patty’s heart could not be repaired at such a young age and so it was decided they would operate after she graduated high school. So in November 1965 she went in for exploratory surgery. What they found was massive damage to the heart and it was irreparable, so they closed her back up. I’m not sure what they were going to do next, but they waited too long. I talked to her, by phone, the day after her surgery and she told me that she had begged her boyfriend to get her out of the hospital because she had a premonition she wasn’t going to make it out alive. She also wanted me to help her get out of the hospital; I remember the desperation in her voice. I felt helpless but tried to convince her she would be alright. I believe it was the next day or day after that I got the phone call at work from my grandmother, who was also close to Patty. I was devastated and had to leave work early.

At the funeral home, Patty’s mother asked us not to attend the funeral because it was going to be a small funeral, family only. I flat out told her I was coming to the funeral! I believe my mother, my father, and myself were the only non-family members at Patty’s funeral. Please correct me if I’m wrong.

This kind, gentle, positive and fun loving young lady deserved so much more. I’m very thankful she lived her short life to its fullest and I’m very thankful that I had the pleasure of knowing her.

Please – I welcome your comments and memories of Patty Gibson. She had lots of friends who loved and admired her and there is so much I have forgotten over the years and would love to hear more.

8 comments:

Purple Tabby said...

What a beautiful tribute.

I barely knew Patti in HS. I see now I missed knowing a gem of a girl.

I’ll be thinking about your post for a long time.
Thank you

TwoDogs said...

Joker,

I remember Patty as a very bright girl with a great big smile and an even bigger heart. I am sorry that I did not know her well - but, what little I did know of Patty - I liked alot....

Great tribute to her! One thing that a friend knows is when they are needed. You were there when Patty needed you and I'm sure that she knew were there at the end.

Thank You for being a friend...

Greybeard said...

How sad to hear that whole story, but Joker, thank you for sharing.
I remember Patty well...
Her gorgeous BRIGHT RED hair and that baby-smooth, flawless skin. She always had a smile to share.
I was in Band with her, and we attended many classes together. She was, as you indicate, a gentle, caring soul.

I'm not surprised to hear that her parents were that strict. Other than Band, our circles didn't intersect, and now I can sorta understand why. I'm glad your mutual interest in horses brought you together... it's nice to know she had a friend she was comfortable sharing secrets with.

She was smart, talented, and kind.
"The good die young"... and Patty certainly falls into that category, doesn't she?

the golden horse said...

Joker,

This is beautiful and well intended.
I remember Patty very well and her early death haunted me over the years.

I remember her mother exactly like you said.
I took several gym classes with her and she always had to sit out on most everything. I would sit by her often and talk. She was a special girl.

I think she accepted her problem with as much grace as a teenager could at that age. She didn't seem to be too thrilled with her upcoming surgery, I know she had doubts.
I knew of her heart problem and since my brother was born with the same thing we had alot to share. He, too, died at a young age from it, 27.
We never ran around together, but I sure remember her wonderful full faced smile and twinkly eyes.
Thank you for a nice job.

Anonymous said...

Joker,
It's wonderful that you wrote the tribute to Patty. She and I talked a fair amount and at some point in school we ate lunch together every day for a year. She was fun loving and very bright. I had no idea her home life was unhappy. I'm very sorry to learn that now. I am sure your friendship with her made her life happier.

I remember my mother calling me in Muncie when Patty passed away and how my stomach sank. She was always a pleasant presence in our lives and I think we'll always remember her smiling face.

Do you know where Patty is buried?

Bo

The Joker said...

You guys are correct, she always has a smile on her face and was rarely negative about anything - always positive and yes, she was a very smart girl and would have gone on to do great things in her life, I believe.

Her parents were not really mean, but they were from the "old school" and very strict and were much older than my parents. Maybe having an only child at such a late age had something to do with it, I don't know. I think her mother pretty much ran the show in that household. Strange to say, I liked her mother even though I didn't understand why she was so restrictive with Patty's life. Her mom took us to Martinsville a couple of times each summer to go swimming, and if I remember correctly it was Patty's parents that took me to the first regatta I'd ever been to in Madison, IN. on the Ohio river.
Thank you all for you kind comments.

The Joker said...

Bo,
I forgot to mention: Patty's homelife was not unhappy in her eyes - only in mine. I sometimes saw her parents as mean and unrelenting, but Patty accepted it as "normal". Things went on in my life that outsiders must have thought bizarre, but for me it was "normal".

I don't remember where Patty was buried, but I'll try to find out.

Purple Tabby said...

FYI
Asoka has added 3 names from the Class of '67 to our memorial list.

see In Memory of Absent Friends

http://vandyskids.blogspot.com/2006/04/classmates-friends-gone-but-not.html